Note: The following are excerpts from the eulogy delivered by Noreen Madden McInnes, director of the diocesan Office for Liturgy and Spirituality, for Brian Avey, at his funeral Mass at Mission San Diego de Alcalá on Jan. 28. He died on Dec. 31.
I was blessed with the privilege and honor to be a colleague and a friend of Brian Avey for 11 years in the Office for Liturgy and Spirituality.
Over the years, Brian worked humbly and diligently to serve our Lord and the people of God. He never complained. No job was too small or too big.
It was his vocation. In fact, he had a favorite brown sweater with a hood that he liked to wear. Many people assumed he was “Brother Brian.” Even people that had only spoken to him on the phone, never met him in person, would call and ask for “Brother Brian.” He just had a gentle, respectful way of speaking with people and doing everything he could to assist them with their liturgical needs.
In addition to his deep spirituality, Brian was a very talented and intelligent man. Before he worked for the Church he was an IT manager who supervised a large organization.
Brian was a fine musician and composer. Everyone knows of his amazing gifts as cantor, pianist and organist, but his favorite instrument was the violin. He considered joining a symphony orchestra at one point.
But instead of staying in the secular world and pursuing a large financial reward, he became a parish choir director and an administrative assistant in the Office for Liturgy in the diocese to humbly serve our Lord. He served in various local parishes as a music minister: Holy Family, St. Patrick’s (Carlsbad), St. Brigid’s.
The work that Brian did at the diocese was far-reaching, and a tremendous blessing to many. The Chrism Mass was one of his favorite projects of the year. With Brian’s support and organization, over 7,000 bottles of holy oils were distributed throughout the diocese for baptisms, confirmations, ordinations, anointing of the sick and catechumens, and dedications of churches.
During Brian’s tenure, he was instrumental in the planning and preparation for significant diocesan liturgies:
- 76 permanent deacons were ordained
- 28 priests were ordained
- 2 bishops were consecrated
- 1 bishop was installed as our ordinary, who would later become a cardinal – Cardinal McElroy
- 2 bishops’ funeral Masses were celebrated — Bishop Cirilo Flores and Bishop Robert H. Brom
The relationship between Bishop Brom and Brian was special.
Brian knew the special brands of hosts, altar wine and altar candles that Bishop Brom preferred and kept them in stock. They often collaborated on music for the prison ministry that Bishop Brom enjoyed in his retirement.
I had to chuckle whenever Bishop Brom would walk into the Liturgy Office, look around and, when he saw Brian wasn’t in, he would sadly say, “Oh, he’s not here,” and walk out.
You might know that among Brian’s other amazing talents was that he spoke five languages, but you probably don’t know that he was also a great impersonator.
One day, when we were in the Pastoral Center Chapel, I asked Brian to test out the ambo microphone.
While my back was to the ambo, I was suddenly shocked to hear Pope Francis praying the “Our Father” in Latin.
I had recently asked Brian if he was working on Pope Leo praying the “Our Father” in Latin with a Chicago accent.
It might surprise you to learn that Brian was raised Mormon.
He told me that, when he was in elementary school, he would go over to St. Therese, San Diego, after school, to play with friends there. But while the other kids were playing outside, Brian shared that he liked to go into the church. He said the smell of the candles really drew him in.
It is clear to me that the Lord was calling him into a deeper relationship with him in the Catholic Faith even at an early age. It took strength and courage to follow that call, become Catholic, and to go on to serve the Church for most of his life.
His strong faith kept him going, continuing to serve. In fact, just a few weeks ago, he asked me how he could volunteer for the office. He started on a project at home, working for the Lord to the very end.
Brian quietly suffered from poor health for as long as I’ve known him, yet, instead of focusing on himself, his attention was on serving others.
Most importantly, Brian deeply loved his wife, Sunny, and always wanted only the best for her. Let us keep her in our thoughts and prayers in this difficult time.
The best way to remember and honor Brian is to let him be our model of strong faith and service to the Lord, to give what we can, to as many as we can, for as long as we can.
